7 DAYS AGO • 3 MIN READ

Self-sabotage ran my career until I did this

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Mindset X

Build superhuman health & monk-like mental fitness through mastering the art of 1% changes.

"You don't have a fear of the unknown, you have a fear of letting go of the known."
- Jiddu Krishnamurti

Have you ever felt like you’re actually going somewhere in your career, only to do something unnecessarily stupid the moment you gain momentum?

That was me. For years, I lived this cycle:

work - progress - self-sabotage - repeat.

But I’ve since found a way to break free, and I want to share what I’ve learned.

Self-sabotaging is basically a fear, your job is to find what the fear is.

  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of success
  • Fear of rejection
  • Fear of unknown
  • Fear of discomfort
  • Fear of disapproval
  • Fear of judgement

There are many more that you may or may not relate too but the point is that something is causing you to self-sabotage because of your inner belief system and it will outwardly impact your chance of career success.

The Fear of Success and Failure

At first, I thought my problem was a fear of failure, I put so much pressure on myself to succeed and make something of my life that I was paralysed with the chance of failing.

"What if I mess up? What if I’m not good enough?"

But as I dug deeper, I realised an equally powerful force: the fear of success.

Success meant change, responsibility, and stepping into a new, unfamiliar version of myself. I wasn’t sure I was ready for that.

Fear of success and fear of failure often coexist, pulling us in opposite directions and leaving us stuck. It’s safer to stay in the middle ground of mediocrity because neither extreme feels manageable.

But this wasn't actually what I wanted, as I mentioned: I wanted success so badly, I couldn't image a life of mediocrity, but I just didn't have the belief in myself that it required, so it resulted in self-sabotaging behaviour.

Inconsistent and unpredictable outcomes precede growth & success, and when I accepted that career turbulence is normal, I began to see setbacks and fluctuations not as personal failures, but as the price of growth.

The Turning Point: Tony Robbins’ Driving Force Test

A breakthrough came when I took Tony Robbins’ Driving Force test. My results? I value uncertainty and growth.

This was the wake-up call I needed; I was subconsciously creating chaos because uncertainty energised me. My brain was wired to thrive in challenge and unpredictability.

But instead of channelling this need constructively - by embracing calculated risks, seeking new skills, or pushing boundaries - I was acting recklessly and making decisions that were frankly outrageous.

I’d sabotage my own progress to manufacture chaos and growth.

Crazy, right!?

...Well, not exactly, it's more common than you think.

[take the test here]

Why We Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage is often a subconscious way to protect ourselves from perceived threats, even if they’re irrational.

Here are some psychological explanations:

1. Impostor Syndrome: We fear being “exposed” as unworthy of success, so we pull the plug before others can.

2. Cognitive Dissonance: If our self-image doesn’t align with being successful, we’ll sabotage ourselves to maintain internal consistency.

3. The Upper-Limit Problem: As Gay Hendricks explains in The Big Leap, we have an internal thermostat for how much success and happiness we think we deserve. When we exceed it, we create problems to bring ourselves back to our comfort zone.

4. Self-Handicapping: By sabotaging ourselves, we create an external excuse for failure, avoiding the painful idea that we might have failed due to lack of ability.


What I Changed

Once I understood my patterns, I made intentional changes:

I Embraced Career Turbulence: Instead of fearing instability, I reframed it as growth in action.

I Focused on Self-Image: I began to work on seeing myself as someone who deserves success, not just someone who 'tries' for it [this coupled with relentless action is a recipe for success, as Yoda said: "do or do not, there is not try."

I Channeled Uncertainty: I aligned my goals & behaviour and created positive challenges, like learning new skills or tackling ambitious projects, rather than creating unnecessary projects.

I Gave Myself Permission to Fail: Fluctuations and mistakes became lessons, not reasons to retreat.

If you’re caught in a loop of self-sabotage, know this: you’re not broken [you're actually doing great if you recognise your self-sabotaging behaviour because most people don't even know it].

Your behaviour likely stems from deeper drives: fear, unsatisfied needs, or even a hidden desire for growth. When you identify the root cause, you can rewrite your patterns, rewire your mind and take control of your career trajectory.

Mindset X

Build superhuman health & monk-like mental fitness through mastering the art of 1% changes.